16 Reasons why the MacBook sucks

by elbertc

I agree the MacBook sucks. I have my own gripes about it, and I hope Johnny Ive is listening.

First, it’s white. Why the hell did they choose this color? They should’ve gone beige, or red even.

Second, the white plastic is too shiny. Why didn’t they just use the same grainy plastic finish found in most computers? Also, what’s with this bulletproof material business? What, do they want me to get shot?

Third, what’s with this two-finger trackpad business? It’s ridiculous! Why couldn’t Apple just place simple scroll wheels on the right and bottom of the trackpad? We’re all used too that and they’re more obvious anyway. Why didn’t they place an extra button for right click? Why do I have to be forced to use an extra finger for scrolling and right clicking? I want my other finger free!

Fourth, it sucks that the OS boots up in about 20 seconds. This means I can’t even go get a cup of coffee while my system boots up. It’s just too short!

Fifth, even worse is this sleep mode. It’s so fast it’s like nothing happened. I mean, I want to see a progress bar that tells me all my work is being preserved. Also, this stupid sleep doesn’t allow me to remove my battery, I want to be able to remove my battery without having to shut down.

Sixth, trashing applications is just way too simple. I was told just to drag unwanted applications into he trash and then empty it. Why can’t these apps have .dll files scattered all over the place? That way, Apple can throw in an uninstaller utility that does its best to look for all of those .dll’s and delete them for me. It’s way too simple, really.

Seventh, it’s too slim. In fact it’s also too wide. Wy can’t Apple just follow the standards and come up with a 4:3 screen? Now I have black bars to the left and right of my old TV shows. That really sucks. What a waste of space.

Eight, who the hell decided to allow me the flexibility of connecting to different types of displays? VGA is the way to go. All this digital business is nonsense. Who can tell the difference anyway?

Ninth, there’s no modem! What, now I’m forced to use a broadband connection? How dare they!

Tenth, why couldn’t apple just place a simple battery release? Don’t they know that we users frequently remove our batteries? I have to use a coin? Why couldn’t it be a simple latch? I don’t care if that latch can accidentally get caught when slipping the computer in and out of a bag. the risk of the battery popping out accidentally is mine. Geez, now I have to keep a P1 coin with me always.

Eleventh, what, no bag? Now I have to buy one? Toshiba, IBM and the rest, they all throw in a standard black bag, why should Apple be the exception?

Twelfth, there are too many accessories for the Mac. It’s all a scam. wrist rugs, trackpad protectors (this one is the most useless of all), keyboard covers, coolpads, I really miss my PC days where our laptops had no accessories at all.

Thirteenth, no viruses? Where’s the fun in that? I want the risk! I want the anti-virus software! That’s my choice!

Fourteenth, no maintenance. That sucks, I like defragging, it’s become a pastime!

Fifteenth, this drag and drop business has gone out of hand. I just want copy and paste. It’s just so silly that I can drag a file straight into the Mail icon in the dock, or even in the applications folder, to create a message with an attachment. I want my routine: open Mail, create new message, click on attach file, locate file and attach. Drag and drop? too simple!

Sixteenth and seventeenth, the magsafe and sudden motion sensor features are just plain stupid. Who the hell trips over laptop cables? Who the hell drops their computers?

Lastly, for the same price, I can get a Dell Inspiron. At least the Inspiron does away with all those stupid extra features I don’t need and comes in the form factor I’m looking for.

Sorry to nitpick and be so negative, I guess the Mac isn’t for everyone.

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